Artificial Wha???

by Kristie LeVangie

That’s right.  This week I bring you something completely bizarre, but innovation used in a way you may have never EVER thought about…

Ladies, have you ever thought to yourself, “Gee, I sure wish regret letting that guy take my virginity?”  Well, for you, there is now an answer.

Sex-toy company, Gigimodo, has created an artificial hymen available at select intimate supply outlets.  I found the best deal at artificialhymens.com, where you can pick up 2 (they only ship in 2) for merely $27.95.  Made of cellulose and water-soluable dye, this here:

can be inserted into the vagina to recreate that magical deflowering moment all over again.

Here’s how it really works:

Once the artificial hymen is inserted carefully into the vagina, it will expand
a little and make the vagina feel tighter. When you begin sexual intercourse
and your lover penetrates you, the artificial hymen will begin to ooze out
a red liquid that looks like blood, not too much, but just the right amount.
This will simulate the defloration of a virgin and stain the bed sheets with
a few drops of simulated blood. By adding in a few moans and groans, you
will undetectably recreate the fantasy of making love to a virgin.

Just when you think you’ve seen everything.

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